Revolution Mother

Revolution Mother

Archive of ‘Relationships’ category

Dating Has Started Becoming Eco-Friendly

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There are more and more dating sites being introduced online, but during the summer of 2014 paper bags made their way into the dating game.

Loveflutter, a UK dating app, introduced a PR event that urged 35 Londoners to meet other singles with a paper bag on their head. Since then, paper bag dating has really picked up steam. Loveflutter created the event in order to raise awareness about their new dating app, little did they know it would open up a great opportunity for singles to join in a new craze.

The paper bag over their heads urged them to forget about how the other singles looked and to learn about the person underneath the bag. They had to write small bits of text all over the bag which helped others to read interesting things about them, rather than focus on the visuals. The participants get just a few minutes to illustrate the bag and make it look individual before popping it on their head and going round to meet other people.

The eco-friendly take on speed dating has hit the love scene by storm and continues to be a great ice-breaking tactic. At first it can be a little strange but once people get passed the weirdness, the atmosphere becomes a very relaxing one where people can learn about new people without having to worry what they look like.

Once the event has finished, participants can take their paper bags home as a souvenir and can even use and re-use it again if they decide to give it another go in the future. Now meeting Mr or Mrs Right has never been easier, and you get to help the environment in the process too.

Paper bag speed dating is the future of meeting the ‘one’, so if you are looking for a creative way to meet that special someone, why not go along and give it a go.

Helping Loved Ones in Recovery

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Drug addiction is tough, and drug recovery is even tougher. When it comes to drug addiction in loved ones, especially in our own kids, we want to believe that treatment will solve everything. That they will go to rehab, get cured, and never look back.

Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. The truth is that 40 to 60 percent of addicts will relapse at least once during their recovery, often within the first year of sobriety. There are several reasons why this happens and the more friends and family member learn about the obstacles recovering addicts face, the better they can assist with the addict’s recovery.

Isolation

As part of the recovery process, your loved one might need to sever ties with old friends and acquaintances, especially if they played a part in his addiction. This can lead to a sense of isolation because while the old friends might be a bad influence, it can be difficult for your loved to cultivate new friendships – especially if the new friends don’t know about his history of addiction. Additionally, relationships with family members could be strained, leading to an even deeper sense of isolation. This disconnectedness from others could lead your loved one to return to those old bad relationships and to drugs and alcohol.

One option is for the friends and family to attend counseling to learn how to interact with the loved one after recovery, and to help heal any old wounds. Another option is for your loved one to enter a transitional living situation.

Programs like Tucson Transitional Living allow people in recovery to live in a group setting with others their age who are also going through recovery. These programs also offer family workshops to help repair damaged family relationships. As a result, your loved one will have the social support he needs to stay sober.

Heavy Emotions

Stress is the most common cause of relapse. Rehabilitation programs do offer some stress management training, but once your loved one leaves the relatively safe confines of the rehab program, she might have a difficult time putting those theories into practice. Although stress is the biggest culprit, it’s not the only one; getting broadsided by an emotional situation, even a positive one, can push someone in recovery over the edge.

For example, your loved one might be worried about returning to school for fear of having to repeat a grade. When she contacts the school she discovers that the school is willing to let her graduate on time if she attends regular meetings, does extra credit, and maintains a certain GPA. She could be so excited at the good news that she decides to celebrate with her favorite drink; conversely, she could also be so anxious about the tasks she has to complete that she takes something to calm her nerves.

You can’t control your loved one’s reaction to heavy emotions. In many cases, the best thing you can do is let her know that you have her back, and help her find ways of coping with the emotions without using drugs. In the example above you could offer to take her somewhere without drugs or alcohol to celebrate. You could also offer to help her complete her tasks, within reason.

Exposure to Drugs or Alcohol

One of the most common ways recovering addicts are exposed to drugs is through prescription medications.

For example, Philip Seymour Hoffman rehabilitated in his 20s and was sober for over 20 years when he started abusing pain medication, possibly as a result of a prescription for an injury.

In some cases your loved one might be able to request a non-narcotic alternative, but there might be other times when the only option is a drug that could trigger a relapse.

Another scenario is where your loved one knowingly ingests a mind-altering substance, believing that they can handle it. This could be prescription medication, alcohol or an illicit drug. It could be the substance that they were originally addicted to, or some other substance that starts a new cycle of addiction.

You can’t keep your loved one in a bubble, but one way to reduce the risk of exposure is to avoid having mind-altering substances in the house. If you must have them, like prescription medications, keep them under lock and key. If your loved one has been prescribed narcotic medications, talk to his doctor about alternatives or, suggest your loved one do so if he is an adult.

If you suspect that your loved one has relapsed, do not lose patience and to not ignore the situation. Be prepared to stage a loving intervention, if necessary, to get them the treatment and support they need.

Christmas Present Ideas That Will Get Your Kids Outside

Your child or children will probably have already signed, sealed and delivered their letter to Santa. If you have a typical 21st century child, they will have asked for video game consoles and other items which confine them to the indoors. If you are looking for ways to encourage your children to spend more time outside then, we have come up with some ideas that will achieve exactly that.

Adventure day out

‘Experience gifts’ can also be enjoyed by kids of all ages. If you do your homework, you will see that there are a number of options for days out that will please even the fussiest of children. For older children, why not let them experience their first drive. The package usually includes an hour-long tuition with a qualified instructor and, if you child feels brave enough; they might be able to take the wheel themselves. Alternatively, you might want to treat your kids to a day of quad biking, horse riding or even a hot air balloon ride. These experiences will not only get your kids off the sofa but will give them something to remember for many years to come.

4148929233_c83b2fb479_zImage from Flickr

Outdoor equipment

A good way of encouraging your children to get some fresh air is to provide them with plenty of outdoor equipment. You may decide on an electric scooter for kids that is not only fun but will make that walk to school a bit quicker! Although they won’t be able to use it for a few months, a trampoline is a fantastic gift for kids. This present will get your kids outdoors and keep them active. If your child likes playing football computer games, he or she may also appreciate a set of football goals and a football. This may encourage your child to take this interest outside, and they may involve their friends in a weekly kick about. You might consider buying your child a bike. This gift will get your kids out and about and doing tricks in no time. For the winter months, your child might also enjoy a sledge or a set of snowshoes.

sidewalk chalkImage from Flickr

Creative

If your child is naturally creative, them a simple box of colourful chalk may entice them outside. Allow them to draw to their heart’s content on your garden patio or pavement outside your home. Small children may really enjoy a grow your own plant kit. You can spend the day outside together digging up the soil and planting the seeds. Their interest in the outdoors will, hopefully, remain as they watch the plant grow. A build your own bird feeder kit is another great gift that will encourage your child to take an interest in the outdoors and nature. You may wish to invest in a small outdoor house for your child. This could be a playhouse or a tree house. This might work well to encourage your kids to spend time outside as it gives them an area they can call their own. You may wish to encourage them to use this space to draw or read.

Family Matters: How To Deal With Your Parents Aging

440967632_9bc1703095_zPedro Ribeiro Simões

When your parents begin to get old, it can be a troubling time. There is nothing nice about watching your parents age, but age catches up with everybody in the end. One thing that nobody ever tells you is that there are many issues age can cause your parents and your family. When people get older, they begin to lose their independence. That means that your parents might become reliant on your for support as they get old. For many people, the realization that their parents are aging is tough. Here are some of the ways in which you can deal with your parents getting older.

Driving problems

There comes a time in everybody’s life when driving is no longer safe. As their child, you are responsible for ensuring that your parents are safe. That means that you need to make sure that your parents still drive in a safe way as they get old. When you see your parents driving, you should check whether they seem safe. If one or both of your parents are losing their eyesight, it is unsafe for them to drive. Telling somebody you love that you think their driving is unsafe will be hard. Your parent is likely to take the news in a bad way. Make sure that you break the news to them in a nice manner.

Health issues

Dealing with health issues in your parents is difficult. We all want our parents to live good, long lives. You should make sure that your parents have a comprehensive health insurance policy. Having access to the best medical care will mean that your parents can get the right treatment when they need it. Your parents might not like it, but you should insist that they get regular check-ups at the hospital. As people age, they tend to avoid going to the doctors because they fear bad news. Your parents need to know about any health issues they have, and so you should make sure that they go to the doctors.

Traveling and vacations

When people get to a certain age, they will find it hard to get travel insurance. That means that it may no longer be safe for them to travel. When you decide to take a trip with your parents, you should make sure that you can get insurance for them before you book. If you can’t get insurance, that is because the insurer believes that the journey won’t be safe for your parents. Make sure that you see whether you can get insurance before booking a huge family vacation.

Housing problems

If your parents are struggling to cope in their home, you can try and offer them some support. Make sure that you make regular visits to your parents so that you can help them with their daily tasks. If you don’t live near to your parents, you might want to consider moving so that you can be close to them. If there comes a time when you can’t help your parents as much as they need, look into senior living housing for them. In a retirement home, your parents will get all the attention they need.

Memory loss

When a parent starts to lose their memory, it can be heartbreaking. It can feel as though your parent is slipping away from you bit by bit. When you notice that one of your parents is having trouble remembering things, you must get medical help for them. Often you can help reduce memory loss with some expert help. See a doctor, who specializes in memory loss. Doing so will mean that your parent gets the best help.

An Amazing Guide To Coping With Divorce When You Have Kids

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Separation and divorce is a natural part of life. Not all marriages work out, and you shouldn’t feel any shame if your married life is coming to an end. If you have children, it is vital that you do what’s best for them. Your divorce can have a negative impact on your children’s lives, and so you need to make the transition as easy as possible. When you’re getting a divorce, it is important that you give your children all the care and support they need. It can be hard, but you need to put aside your feelings and think about your children. Here is an amazing guide to coping with divorce when you have kids.

Shield them from the technicalities

Divorce is a technical business. There are things to discuss and papers to sign. The process might take weeks or months to complete. The last thing you want to do is drag your children through the process with you. They don’t deserve that at all. Book an appointment with Beacon Family Law consultation in Perth, but make sure you have somebody to watch the kids. The worst way your children can find out about your divorce is through a series of legal discussions.

Sit them down together to talk

Divorce is a huge deal. Many families leave the explanation of their divorce to just one parent. It has to come from both of you. Despite the fact that you are separating, you need to present a united front. Your children have grown up with both of you. One of the major problems with divorce is that children see you as two separate entities. That means that they might start trying to play you off against each other. Showing that the divorce doesn’t change the relationship you have with your children is the best way to go.

Arrange a step by step plan

What is your plan for after the divorce? Many people rush into a divorce without ever talking about what they will do next. Which of you will be moving out of the marital home? Where will they live? You need to make sure that you have a plan of action in place. The transition period needs to be as smooth as possible. Your children shouldn’t see you arguing about things. You need to explain to them what is going to happen.

Give them extra love and attention

During this period, your children will need more attention than usual. Many parents make the mistake of focusing on themselves, when they should be caring for their kids. Make sure that you show your children that they are still important. When parents divorce, children can sometimes feel as though they are unimportant. Your children’s identities depend on the family unit. They look up to you as parents and learn from you. Your children will need extra support and reassurance. Make sure that your children feel stable in the family home. Tell them that they won’t lose either parent and that they won’t have to move. Reassuring your children that their lives won’t change will make them feel much better.

Try not to disrupt their home life

Your children have a routine that they follow every week. It is important that you try not to disrupt that routine too much. Sometimes there is nothing you can do about disruptions. Wherever possible, you should keep things stable for your children. That level of stability will make the entire process easier in the long run. Let your children keep their routines. You should never use your children as ammunition or stop them doing things out of spite.

Ideas To Help You Encourage Your Children To Spend More Time Outdoors

8645901176_61df2dbc7c_zLoren Kerns

There is no doubt about it; our kids are spending too much time indoors. They either watch television or play video games for hours on end. Yes, it is easy to cure that problem; unplug the television and throw the games console away. But as the children say; what else is there for them to do? We are an overprotective nation, and we don’t let our little ones out to play anymore. The dangers are no greater now than they ever were, we just hear about them more thanks to the internet. Our children are suffering because of our anxieties, and it is wrong. If something isn’t done about it soon, those who never get to go out unsupervised with their friends will be at a significant disadvantage in life.

I will write more about allowing your children to play away from home without supervision in my next article. It is all about managing the risk. For today, I wish to suggest ways you can encourage them to use your garden more than they do now. It isn’t hard, but you must make an effort to turn the garden into an appealing place for them. Here are a few top tips to help you achieve your goal.

Water Sports

Buy a swimming pool. It is likely to be a massive investment, but it is worth every penny, in my opinion. You can now find fibreglass pool liners online that cut the installation costs and time by half. The filtration equipment and heater comes in kit form too, so they are a DIY job at last.

Alternatively, you could buy a freestanding unit. It will probably not be as big as a sunken pool and will cost about the same. The pool is good for their physical health and gives you a fantastic reason to spend more time together.

Outdoor Entertainment

Your little ones will know the program listings very well, and they will try to go back indoors when a show starts. Why not take the TV outdoors so they can enjoy the fresh it while they watch it. The guys at http://www.thetvshield.com/enclosures say that the products are safe to use and weatherproof. Garden television is the future as far as I am concerned.

Gazebo

Modern gazebos are more like detached conservatories these days. You kids will want to spend time out there because it is such an appealing space. Maybe they could use it as a place to do their homework, or to sit with friends who come round to visit. They will ask you if they can take the video games console out there; the decision is yours.

Apparatus

Swings and slides are as popular today as ever. The best structures also feature a climbing frame and are made from timber that will last for many years. Your kids will have many adventures out there and will come to no harm as long as you have the foresight to put a soft base down in case they fall. I suggest you use a product made from recycled tyres. They are bouncy and durable.

It is much better to tempt kids outside rather than force them. When you install the best features, they will be powerless to resist. Good luck with your mission; perseverance will pay off.

8 Ways You Can Spend More Time With Your Kids

We can all be guilty of not spending enough time together as a family. Kids soon grow up, so it’s important that you spend as much quality time as you can with them while they’re young. This helps to shape them as a person and teach them valuable life lessons/skills. Here are 8 ways you can spend more time with your kids:

Work From Home

Working from home is a great way to spend more time with your kids if they aren’t at school yet. If you have a fantastic idea for a business venture or product, then set out making it  a reality! Watch Dragon’s Den to get inspired.

Hire a Housekeeper

Cleaning the house can take up a whole lot of time, and it can feel like it’s all you do at times. By hiring a housekeeper, you can spend much more time with your kids. You’ll also feel much less stressed as you don’t have as much to do! You can find housekeepers in London from Supacare.

Say No to Over Scheduling

Kids need their own hobbies, but make sure you say no to over scheduling. Allow them one after school activity per day, so that you still get to spend time with them. This will also teach them some valuable lessons, such as making decisions.

Limit TV Time

The TV can sometimes be a great way to help kids learn and keep them entertained, but it might not be a good idea to have it on all the time. Try limiting TV time to one or two hours a day in the week, and use the weekends to spend real quality time together. You could even ban TV through the week!

Read to Them Before Bed

Reading to kids before bed helps to develop their imagination and get them into books. Books are great for helping kids to learn and get them excited about literature. Stories from the likes of Roald Dahl are perfect. They’ll always remember this special time you spent together!

Set Aside Time for a Friday Fun Night

Friday is a great day to have a family fun night, as it marks the end of the working week. You could all get a takeaway on this day and play some of your favourite games. It’s a great way to bond as a family!

Always Eat Dinner Together

Eating dinner together is a great family experience that is not practiced very often these days, unfortunately. Don’t have the TV on, eat dinner around the table, and ban subjects that could cause arguments. This will become a fantastic time for everybody to bond!

Play Sports Together

If you enjoy keeping fit, there’s no reason your kids can’t join in. Try playing sports and keeping fit together rather than handing them over to a babysitter! You could even just go on long walks. Remember, you must take time for yourself too. Here are 5 fun ways to spend your down time!

Now you and your kids will bond like never before!

3921181137_521f8a89b4_bImage Author: Flickr

A Handy Cheatsheet for Keeping the Kids Entertained on a Long Journey

If you’ve ever had to undertake a long journey with young children in tow then you’re probably already all-too-familiar with how challenging this can be. If you’re traveling by car, this can be difficult enough. But if you’re using public transport, the experience can prove to be even more of a challenge. People aren’t always quite as patient with children as perhaps they should be. So, if yours are crying because they’re bored or tired, you may end up being faced with a barrage of filthy looks and unsympathetic faces.

So, to help ensure that your next trip with the children doesn’t end up being the journey from hell, we strongly advise that you take a few minutes to read this post.

Have Plenty to Keep them Entertained

Thanks to the amazing advancements in modern technology, keeping the kids entertained on a long journey isn’t half as hard as it used to be. In the not-so-distant past, parents were forced to lug coloring books, crayons, jigsaws and Lego onto planes, trains and automobiles. Nowadays, moms and dads can thankfully travel a little lighter. Cell phones and tablets have all manner of games and applications to keep the little ones occupied.

Just make sure you set some parental locks on the device beforehand to prevent spending a fortune on accidental in-app purchases. Just as important is to make sure that your phone or tablet has got plenty of battery life. The last thing you want is to run out of juice, and then have to deal with a bored and restless child for the remainder of the journey. For this reason, it’s also always best to have a back-up plan in place. So, chuck a couple of activity books and Zebra pen refills into a bag to give you that extra peace of mind.

Have a Good Old Fashioned Sing-Song

This is one probably best kept for family-only road trips, where you’re traveling by car. Kids love anything interactive, and there are countless traditional car songs that require you to interact as a family, as well as sing. ‘Wheels on the bus’ is a rather obvious choice, but the song endures for a reason – both kids and adults love it! For older kids, singing a favorite family pop song works just as well.

Car Games

Traditional car games such as the ‘license plate game’ are another great way of stopping boredom from setting in when you’re traveling for long periods at a time. You can also use it as an opportunity to test your kid’s geography skills. Even if your child is yet to go to school, there’s nothing wrong with starting them young! Ask them questions about the environment around them. Also, make sure they at least have a vague understanding of where it is they’re going. Encouraging them to be interested in, and ask questions about, the world around them will place them in good stead for their future education.

Now you’re armed with plenty of ideas and inspiration. So, just follow our advice and you’ll never have to contend with bored children on a long journey again!

2762448850_a09394722f_zImage Source: Flickr

Planning Your Wedding With the Kids in Tow

Planning your big day with your beloved is a special time in any relationship. When you have children together, this can heighten the sense of togetherness. For many couples, they have made the decision to have children first, and conclude with the formalities later. Of course, planning your wedding day when you have children in tow can make the affair a little more stressful. No one said that planning a wedding would be a stress-free endeavour.

2408535634_f9953a5dbf_zWith thanks to Ali Nishan for the image

But, there are some utterly perfect ways that you can plan your big day after you have had children. Let’s take a look at how this can be done:

Include Your Children in More Ways Than One

Of course, you will want your children to be flower girls, page boys and important parts of your day. This goes without saying. But, you can include them in the planning stages of your special day. For many couples, getting a child’s perspective on proceedings can add to the romanticism of their big day. Take them to your preferred venues and get their opinions on things. Kids are known to be brutally honest. Getting their opinion is important. It can add a lot more to the affair.

Request that your kids help you with the smaller details too. Wedding card designs, dresses and flowers are all important parts of the day. See how the children feel about these things and use their ideas. Utilising your kids’ ideas will make your wedding day even more special. Completing these tasks as a family will heighten your feelings of togetherness.

Ask your children to do a reading or say a few words in front of your guests. Ask them to write a poem about their mummy and daddy. Poems are the perfect way to include your children in the main event. It’s fair to say; you won’t have a dry eye in the house.

Planning is Everything

Factoring in your kids needs on your big day is important. While you may feel that your big day is about you, you need to consider how they are going to feel during the main event. They may feel tired and irritable. What’s more, they will want to snack throughout the day, not wait for a big meal. You need to incorporate their schedule into your wedding day plans and timetable. This will make for a more enjoyable experience for all. The extra planning may seem like a burden, but it will help your day go more smoothly.

Budgeting and Money Matters

When you have children, your priorities change. You may have dreamt of the big white wedding. But, if you cannot afford this with the kids in tow, it may be time to be more realistic about your plans. You can still have a lavish big day, but you may need to invite fewer people. Keep your guest list small and intimate. Stick to close friends and family. What is more, if your kids know the guests at your wedding, they will feel more comfortable. A room full of strangers can be intimidating. Plus, you will have a lot of extra hands to help with babysitting duties.

5 Top Tips for Dating Online

datingIn recent years, dating websites have helped completely transformed the world of dating. Now, instead of drunken meetings in random clubs, bars and social events, it’s possible to find potential partners through reputable dating sites. Definitely the best thing about this process is you’ve got a greater chance of a relationship developing into a long term thing simply because you are privy to important information about other single people in advance that you don’t have if you’ve met someone randomly on a night out.

So dating websites have changed the dating process largely for the better, or so it would seem.

Admittedly, online dating cannot guarantee you’ll find love, but it’s certainly worth giving a good go. I’ve included a few tips below that may be useful if you’re considering giving online dating a try…

1. Be honest in your personal profile.

Honesty is by the best policy when putting together your personal profile. It’s hard not to feel the pressure to add a plethora of hobbies and interests simply because everybody else seems to have added loads and because you don’t want to appear boring. This will only result in immense difficulties and embarrassment further down the line when somebody questions you about your “hobbies”. Remember, it’s only worth being with somebody who likes and respects you for you.

2. Don’t disregard a nice person based on a picture.

Despite it being a dead cert that the vast majority will have selected their most flattering pic to submit as their profile picture, some people simply just don’t take a good photograph. It’s worth remembering this fact if you find someone with interests and hobbies that match your own, and who you find you enjoy interacting with because you may discover you’re attracted to them in person, if you choose to later meet up.

3. Consider what is essential to you in a life partner.

It’s good to establish a concrete idea of what qualities are important to you in a potential partner before you start chatting to people. One fab aspect of dating online is that, technically, you could meet someone who is close to exactly what you are searching for. Although, of course, nobody will ever be perfect, online dating gives you a degree of control over certain characteristics, for instance, your potential partner’s level of education, or their earnings, whether they smoke, drink, want (or have) children. These things often don’t matter in the short term, but can quickly and easily become sources of conflict later on, so thinking carefully about what you want or don’t want can aid you in finding somebody who matches you and your needs in important areas.

4. Remember that practically everyone finds online dating hard!

Although you should aim to be as natural as possible in your interactions online, remember that the people you’re chatting to are likely to also be finding the online dating process tough, so perhaps their messages may not be truly reflective of their actual personalities. They may appear to try too hard, or go the opposite way by keeping their communications simple to the point of being boring, or they may hide their sense of humour because they haven’t got to grips with your humour yet.

Remember, online interactions don’t convey tone, facial expression or body language, which often results in points being misinterpreted all too quickly and easily. Remember this when you’re communicating via the site and give people a bit more time to get to know you and relax a little and, consequently, for their true personality to come through.

5. Don’t be embarrassed about meeting someone through a dating website.

There was once a stigma associated with online dating, but this is definitely now a thing of the past. In some cases, older generations not quite as au fait with the wonders of the Internet as the younger generation is may not completely understand or appreciatethe process, but with such a dramatic increase in the popularity of online dating sites it’s inevitable that the stigma has been practically eradicated.

This post was written by Becky Stretton, author of the parenting blog, Green Duo. Visit her blog to read all about Becky, her husband Steve, their new baby daughter Phoebe-Rae and all their adventures in their green, eco-friendly household.